wtf, guys?

Lately, it seems like everyone is non-committal—particularly men ages 25-40. My friends and I are successful, confident women. We’re not looking to get married anytime soon…we’d just like to meet men who take dating seriously.

Unfortunately, the men we associate with have no interest in obtaining serious girlfriends. I’ve been conducting my own little investigation and most of these guys keep telling me the same thing…they’re really picky…they’re still not over past relationships…they’re not looking for anything serious. Also, these guys don’t even pick up the phone and make calls to ask us out. They constantly text message. It’s infuriating.

Is there some secret manual men are carrying around in their back pockets that lists the 10 lamest excuses to avoid monogamy? I just don’t get it.

The Practical Cogitator says: This is not a unique situation. Monogamy, eligible bachelors, and dating are age-old issues. The problem here as I see it is technology. Text etiquette, email etiquette, answering machine etiquette, voice mail etiquette…what are the proper uses of these technologies? In middle-school we used to write notes and pass them in class. “He broke up with me in a note!” Doors would slam and an evening of phone calls from encouraging girlfriends would ensue. Now, after one dinner date, a young woman can expect a text…either inviting her on another date, or a dump-text…“this just isn’t working out…” It was dinner! What’s not working out? Seems to me texting is useful at loud concerts—”What section are you in?” or “I’m running late,” or “On my way…” but other than coordination of location and simple messages, texting is inappropriate. These guys are juvenile.

May I suggest older men? Not senior citizens or anything, but a man who will call and treat a woman nicely? One just old enough to still use the good old fashioned telephone…

The Sales Guy says: This is not an easy question to answer. There seems to be a whole generation of men who, whether it’s how they were raised or the internet techno-surreal computer game environment they grew up in, but it seems there’s a person to person social break going on. When I was a pup you didn’t have the oh-so intimate late night drunken mass-text booty calls or the oh-so-romantic email breakups. To call this an etiquette problem might be a bit of an understatement.

If a 20- or 30-something notices how many hot young girls are with older men, the answer quite possibly is the mass alienation their twisted social behavior has produced. Time to get your act together show some fucking common courtesy and treat a woman like you’d want your sister to be treated. Open a door, pull back a chair, help her with her coat, send her flowers…just because. Be a man!

Ruthless says: Um, I hate to be the one to tell you this—and I hate even more to quote a truly trite and terrible movie—but…“He’s Just Not That Into You.”

Do you know that there are women out there who are being stalked via cell phone, the thing constantly sounding off with calls from one man or more just dying to talk to them? What those women wouldn’t give for a simple “Call me when U can,” or “Why won’t U answr?” or even “I’m going to slit my wrists if I can’t talk 2 U.”

And, with the latter in mind, you should keep in mind that some messages are better delivered non-verbally.

let the good times…stop!

I’m not Catholic, or even Christian, but I like to give up something for Lent, just as an exercise in self-discipline and good health. I’m curious, what do AV’s experts give up for Lent?

The Practical Cogitator says: Bad vocabulary habits (like saying “like” too many times or “ummm”); nicotine (although this is something worth giving up indefinitely); soda (what’s wrong with drinking water?); watching TV while eating; consuming environmentally unfriendly products; purchasing anything made in China (try to buy American for once). That’s about it. Good luck!

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