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Trailer for "Catch and Release"

Nearly a year after its originally scheduled release date, this Jennifer Garner vehicle is being released into theaters for what I can only imagine will be a brief swim on its way to heavy rotation on the Lifetime Channel, where it can only be improved by periodic breaks for commercials hawking Vagisil, Depends and Senekot. An alternately (and sometimes simultaneously) clichéd and offensive romantic comedy about a woman who learns her late fiancee’s secrets while sharing a house with his three best friends, this was reportedly withheld from release until the pregnant Garner gave birth and reshoots could be done. (Which implies that there was an earlier version of this that was even worse.) Catch and Release marks the directorial debut of Susannah Grant, screenwriter of In Her Shoes and Erin Brockovich. She also wrote this script, which makes it clear who is to blame for the preposterous plotting and characters that are either undeserving of sympathy or denied the sympathy they deserve. Garner seems to be trying to prove she can act by looking relentlessly homely, but the truly painful performance comes from Clerks director Kevin Smith: Never a slim fellow at best, he is seldom if ever seen without his mouth full or about to be filled. (If he hoped to make a point about Hollywood’s representation of overweight characters, it’s negated by a script that makes him the eunuch in a palace of horndogs.) This being the week in which many viewers will be heading out to see the movies anointed by the god Oscar, it’s no surprise that Hollywood uses it to let out the stinkers it’s contractually obligated to promote (though at least the studio had enough faith in it to preview it for the press, which is more than can be said for Epic Movie, Smokin’ Aces and Blood and Chocolate, all of which are also skulking into cineplexes this week, along with Steven Soderbergh’s The Good German, which almost certainly deserved better.)