Country singer Toby Keith’s second foray onto the movie screens of America has next to nothing to do with his 2003 hit that provides the title (a good ol’ boy salute to vigilantism and lynching). Nor does it expand on that song’s video, which cast Keith as an FBI agent and Willie Nelson as a profiler who helps him track down a serial killer. (You can tell it was designed as a promo for a potential movie.) What you will find onscreen is less than 90 minutes of a script that Burt Reynolds in his drive-in heyday wouldn’t have bothered to spit tobacco juice on. Keith stars as a New Mexico deputy sheriff named Rack (whether that’s a first or last name I couldn’t figure out). His girlfriend (Gina Gershon) walks out on him for forgetting her birthday, but he doesn’t spend much time bemoaning the loss when he hears his old flame Annie (Claire Forlani), who was “hotter than donut grease in high school,” returns from Chicago. “The big city’s too fast for me—I miss the people here,” she purrs at him, clearly not referring to the Mexican drug lord who kidnaps her while she’s still warm from Rack’s bed and holds her in exchange for the release of his brother. This requires Rack to launch a mini-invasion of Mexico accompanied by his deputies Lonnie (breast-fixated comedian Rodney Carrington, who co-wrote this with Keith) and Skunk (Ted Nugent, who is not trusted with the delivery of any dialogue). Did I mention the flatulent hound dog? Did I need to? The plot is so minimal that the film is padded out with cameo appearances from such old-school country stars as Mel Tillis, Mac Davis, and David Allen Coe, as well as a bizarre stop at a circus freak show run by Willie Nelson. Keith is no great shakes as an actor, and a bit on the beefy side for an action hero. His detractors may enjoy picking the movie apart for hits of racism, sexism, and anti-Semitism, but it hardly matters—the whole thing is so slight and lazily assembled that even Keith’s fans are likely to ignore it until it pops up on TV some Sunday afternoon, at which point they may or may not sit all the way through it.

—m. faust