Faith in Humanity

A man was hospitalized on Nov. 26 after getting trampeled by frenzied “Black Friday” shoppers during the early morning rush at a North Buffalo Target. Is it really worth peeing in a bag the rest of your life to save $60 bucks on that Xbox? At this point it’s pretty safe to say, society can’t be saved.

Apostasy

After dropping the potential game-winning score in OT, Buffalo Bills wide receiver Stevie Johnson took his frustrations to Twitter on Nov. 28, denouncing none other than God himself for the Bills’ 19-16 loss to the Pittsburgh Steelers. “I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!!”

Big Box Development

After years of whorishly attempting to lure prudish big-box retailers to the Erie Canal Harbor with copious amounts of public money, project officials abandoned that folly on Nov. 29 and unveiled a scaled down plan that focuses more on small business and community-centered development.

SIndefinite Vacations

One day after insisting he could still overcome a 525 vote deficit, State Sen. Antoine Thompson gave in and let reality do the talking, conceding the race for the 60th District on Nov. 30 to Republican Mark Grisanti. Chin up ‘Toine, you know there’s a lovely place down in Jamaica to recuperate.

Defiance

By a 9-6 margin, the Erie County Legislature voted on Nov. 30 to defy the will of County Exec. Chris Collins and restore $4 million in funding for the library system and $1.2 million to local arts and cultural agencies. Collins still holds the trump card however—in the form of a veto—and is likely to use it.

Rank of Terrance Pegula—who purportedly signed an agreement to purchase the Buffalo Sabres on Dec. 1—on Forbes’ 2010 ranking of the 400 richest Americans. Stemming from the $4.7 billion sale of his Pennsylvania oil and natural gas company, Pegula’s net worth is estimated at $3 billion. The Sabres’ current owner Tom Golisano ($1.2 billion) came in at #332.